Update on the arm

Josiah had another follow-up doctor's visit on Tuesday afternoon, the final one that we'll have here in England. Everything is healing up well, and the only frustrating part is that the particular doctor we saw still didn't want him in a full cast. This means his arm is still only supported by a plaster backslab, with surrounding padding and bandaging from armpit to knuckles. I'd definitely prefer the more bulletproof full cast. He's only 4, and we can't keep him entirely from running and playing around (he LOVES to run), yet a fall at this point could be dangerous. It's also easy for other people to knock into him, especially other children when we're out and about at kids' attractions. Ah well. We're doing our best to keep him safe without smothering him.

For those who are medically curious, here's the x-ray from the day Josiah fell. Yikes. You can see a triangle piece just above the elbow fully separated from rest of the bone that's hanging down. No wonder it was a nearly 2-hour surgery to set and pin. And on that note, I didn't realize that the pins were poking out of his body. I was with him on Tuesday when they removed the bandaging for the first time. It was gruesome! The surgical wound hadn't been cleaned or dressed in two weeks, his arm looked weird, hardware was sticking out, Josiah began screaming with pain again as they worked on stitches – yep, I ended up lying on the ground on the brink of blacking out! :) How embarrassing. The only good part about that was I could then distract Josiah by pointing out how much braver he was than me, telling him he'd better not tell Daddy that Mommy had to lie down on the floor, etc.! He was giggling again in pretty short order.

England 3: Corfe Castle

On our first Saturday, we had one of the best days of our vacation – at Corfe Castle, with Danni, Adam, Grace, and Olivia. The sun shone, the air was cool and clear, and the scenery was just beautiful. I'm pretty sure that it's been rainy every time I've been to Corfe in the past two decades, so it was wonderful to actually spend the day there, get out on the grounds, and climb the ruins. Corfe Castle was begun by William the Conqueror sometime after his arrival into England in 1066. For several hundred years, it was a mighty fortress and castle with its prominent setting high on the steep hill. Later, it became a fine residence, and in the 1630s it was purchased by the powerful Bankes family. Alas, in a story of death and betrayal coupled with great bravery on the part of the lady of the castle, it was destroyed barely a decade later in the English Civil War. The amazing ruin today has cast its shadow over the village below for nearly 350 years, with much of the tumbled stone from the ruin incorporated into the residences below. 

We started out day on the grounds just below the castle, enjoying the available activities and then eating a picnic lunch. 

What do you think? Does 14th century garb suit us?

 Beautiful countryside in a valley below.

And the view from another angle, looking back toward the town of Corfe Castle. 

We didn't know it ahead of time, but "Jigsaw the Jester" was doing fun shows at Corfe Castle each Saturday in August. The kids loved it! 

 

Clambering around the ruins. 

William didn't get to see much of the castle itself!

After the picnic, he conked out in the stroller for a nice nap. 

In the afternoon, there was a "learn to be a jester" session with juggling balls and batons, ribbons, and all sorts of other fun equipment. Jigsaw gave Josiah a few lessons on one-armed tricks!

Jesse shows off his impressive plate-spinning skills....

...but Olivia proves it's mere child's play! 

 Leaving the castle behind wasn't so hard with the promise of ice cream down in the village below.

And to top off our lovely day in Corfe Castle, we spied the steam train in the gaps between houses as we headed out. We snapped this picture out of the window as we drove past! 

We then headed back to Danni and Adam's for a reeeally delicious Indian take-away supper, and I'd be remiss if I didn't mention that the night ended with a Casler-Grady production. Grace (5), Josiah (4), and Libby (3) put on a wonderful puppet show for us. The story line was dark and cautionary, involving a decidedly ungracious fairy (who wouldn't share her bath) and an ill-fated group of woodland animals (named Benny, Lenny, Jenny, and so on) who gave their lives one after another in pursuit of bath time justice. The puppeteers brilliantly lightened their potentially sombre tale with the addition of many comedic techniques that kept the audience in stitches. (We have it on video so at some point, with better bandwidth, I'll have to get it posted. It's a massive file...)

England 2: Getting Underway

Given that Josiah was in a fair bit of pain to start and still recovering from surgery, we didn't try to do much of anything on Wednesday or Thursday other than visit with family. It was nice to take it easy for a few days, and happily, Josiah could hardly have had a better place in which to recuperate! Ann sewed up some super cute slings for him, brilliantly tailored several shirts so they could get on and off his thickly bandaged arm, and found the perfect chocolate "Mr. Bump" as a special gift (which he still hasn't eaten, because he loves it so much!). No surprise, it didn't take too long for Josiah to start perking up. By Thursday evening, we ventured out for a little walk down in Wimborne after supper, and on Friday we enjoyed several hours at the model village with Ann, Grace, and Olivia. The week disappeared without much proper holiday making...but all things considered, we were happy that our vacation was able to get underway as quickly as it did.

 Josiah with his prized "Mr. Bump" chocolate. The white chocolate bandages are hilarious! 

On our Thursday evening walk, throwing leaves, flowers, and sticks into the water below.

At the Wimborne Model Village on Friday. In addition to the wonderful model town layout (which I remember so fondly from my own childhood, and which depicts Wimborne much as it was when my Mom was a child), they now have some play areas, a Thomas train layout, and little Wendy houses. Josiah, Grace (center) and Olivia had fun building a small house within this particular house here! 

Posing near the village. 

William, as usual, was more interested in sticks and rocks than the attraction itself. We had thought he might enjoy peering into all of the little windows to see the miniature layouts and shop fronts...  Ah well!

Later that afternoon, a big teddy bear picnic was arranged in the back garden. Fun! 

Because Josiah's teddies and William's ellie had to go through the wash, they observed the picnic from the drying line, with their picnic food clipped to their paws. Fortunately, the animals were quite satisfied with this arrangement. 

Friday evening, we went to my cousin Danni's house, where she and Adam put on a wonderful cookout with all five of my English cousins plus various significant others. I wish we could have spent more time just visiting with everyone evening, but the boys required a fair bit of attention. Even so, it was great!

England 1: Departures and Arrivals

I have been terribly remiss this summer in keeping the blog up to date. Life is always so full! Perhaps I'll go back at some point and do a June and July retrospective. At present, though, I'm hoping to getting up some documentation of our current travels in England... 

Hard to believe, but it's been 3+ years since our last visit here to southern England, where Mom grew up and where her family still resides. We drove to Newark, NJ on Monday, August 1 and in due time arrived in London's Heathrow airport, Tuesday morning. The boys were absolutely perfect for the hours and hours of driving...waiting...flying...more waiting...more driving... Jesse was capable as ever in immediately piloting our rented 5-speed little Fiat Punto (on practically no sleep) through the highways, byways, and roundabouts from the airport to Colehill in Dorset.

Josiah loved every minute of the journey!

We had been pretty concerned about how the travel would go with the boys, especially for William -- who's prone to ugly fits and anger at times. We were definitely relieved to make the journey safely and happily! What we didn't expect was what happened next. Within two hours of arriving at Colin and Ann's, Josiah took a nasty fall off of a bike. Ann whisked Jesse and Josiah to Poole Hospital, and soon he underwent a nearly 2-hour surgery to have the upper bone in his right arm set and wires inserted; a triangle shaped piece of bone near the elbow basically came off. It was a bad break.

I was anxiously waiting at home for about 18 hours with only one quick call from Jesse when Josiah first went into surgery on Tuesday evening. By all accounts, though, Josiah was a real trooper once he got some morphine to kill the pain. Apparently he was asked by a few nurses, "Are all the chaps in America as brave as you?" :) He was kept in hospital until early Wednesday afternoon.

It definitely was a rough start to our trip, but we felt so blessed that Josiah got wonderful care, that we're staying with gracious family and could take it easy for a few days, and that our vacation here was scheduled to be two and a half weeks long, meaning that a few bad days weren't going to spoil the entire trip.

William and I had a lot of quality time together while we waited for word from Daddy about big brother. 

My first glimpse of my brave boy in hospital on Wednesday at discharge time. He was pretty wobbly for a day or so, but a new teddy from the hospital staff did him a world of good! 

Even trains didn't do much to pick him up when we first got home...

Rain, rain

We were all delighted when Jesse's softball game got rained out tonight. It POURED.

As you can see, there were much better activities on offer for a daddy and his boys!

Baby Levi

It is a very good thing that my children were not born in March or April. They would never, ever get a birthday party, because hoooo-boy, my life is beyond insane at semester's end. I'm content with barely maintaining the family's survival at this time of year. Celebrations? Special events? Wouldn't happen.

However...

I am sooooo delighted to report that Tim and Holly's wee one has safely arrived!! The fact that it's taken me two weeks to put up a post celebrating his birth is evidence of my former point, but hooray for new babies! Levi Michael John was born on Friday, April 29th. He was 7+ pounds and is the most adorable little peanut. I've already successfully bartered a few home cooked meals in exchange for some serious cuddle time. He's a perfect addition to the family. :)

Josiah is totally enamored with his cousin too. He cracked us up when we first went to meet Levi in hospital. The baby was wrapped in the standard hospital burrito swaddle, his knees hiked up in the super-tight wrappings. You know the look -- he basically was a tiny blue lozenge with a baby head on top. So cute (!) but baffling to a preschooler. Josiah pulled Jesse down and whispered with curious wonder tinged with concern, "Daddy, has he grown his legs yet?" We quickly assured him that Levi, unlike baby tadpoles, came with legs fully formed, but I don't think he believed us until the legs were produced for inspection a few days later at another visit!

Easter

We had a beautiful, relaxing, warm Easter Sunday here in Lancaster. After church in the morning, Jesse and I had a little egg hunt in our front yard for the boys...and I couldn't resist taking some pics of them in their adorable matching argyle sweaters, too! Thanks to my mom for the sweaters to Jesse's mom for the oxford shirts!

Then we were off to Jim and Tillie's house for Sunday dinner, along with Tim and Holly too. The boys were ecstatic over a big Easter gift that Mama and Pop Pop had for them: a sand and water play table for the back porch at their house! Tim and Jesse put it together immediately, and it provided a wonderful afternoon of fun for the kiddos.

A little outtake: 
We couldn't get any decent shots of the two boys together because William kept crawling off! The few shots we got of them side-by-side either showed William intently picking at the flowers, which he did for ages, or had Josiah making awkward faces...  Ah well! 

Alien attack

Don't be frightened, earthlings. In case you couldn't tell by the huge smile, he came in peace! 

The text on his body reads "ALIEN PLANET."

Update: Evaluation

On a whim, I called the Early Intervention folks last Monday (see previous post). Due to a cancellation, they were able to move William's evaluation to this afternoon! So, they were here for about 3 hours today, and the good news is that the women were really wonderful and William's behavior was pretty representative of what's typical for him. I think they were able to get an accurate read on where he's at. On the other hand, the bad news is that he falls below the "at risk" line in a several domains, testing in the bottom 1 or 2% of his age group for communicative abilities, motor skills, and social-emotional abilities. (One example: his expressive language is at the level of an 8-month-old baby, and he would have been scored even lower if the evaluator hadn't trusted me on some things that William didn't perform for her but I'm sure are in his repertoire.) Their overall response was in line with mine; he's fine in some areas, but he's got problems in others that have a worrying flavor.

An occupational therapist will begin visiting our home every other week to work on balance, movement, plus more general behavioral issues, and another therapist will come in the alternate weeks to work on communication. The team here today also recommended quite strongly that we consider an autism evaluation or, better yet, see a developmental pediatrician – although apparently the latter could involve a wait of 9-10 months, so into 2012 (which seems utterly unbelievable, don't you think?).

As I wrote last time, I so want to time-warp to the fall and know whether we're running around with a chatty, funny, normal toddler or coming to terms with a diagnosis or set of needs...

Growing concerns

I have a Ph.D. in developmental psychology. I teach about developmental milestones, talk to dozens of parents of young children each year, and occasionally even serve as a "developmental specialist" for local families. Ironic, then, that my two children have been so far from typical in their developmental trajectories! I know as well as the next person that "normal" is based on averaging across the population, and actual, individual children are always going to be somewhat ahead of or behind the curve. But my kids? Not even close.

For instance, Josiah's vision problems (among other things) put his motor skills way behind during infancy and toddlerhood. At 14 months, he tested at 3 standard deviations below the mean for motor abilities (which is to say, in the bottom third of one percent, or put another way, the least proficient kid of 300 of his age). Conversely, his language by age 2 was in the top one percent, and I'd guess he remains somewhere up there. Extremes. Of course what counts is that overall he's just totally happy, healthy, and normal – a great little boy! (I should note that his motor skills are well within "normal" today; he's caught up just fine. I should also note that his eye specialist mentioned bifocals as a possibility for him just this past week. No, we're not going that route!)

Now William. I've been writing off niggling worries over him for over half a year. He officially reached 18 months a week ago, and I think hitting this deadline has really nailed me. For one thing, he still isn't walking, although that's a bit lower on my worry scale. Of much greater concern to us: He doesn't speak at all either. Not at all, as in, not even the most rudimentary "Ma" or "uh-oh." He very rarely babbles linguistic syllables – he just grunts, whines, etc. – and he chooses not to (or can't?) imitate any sounds we make. In the last few weeks he's *finally* begun doing some occasional pointing (he should have started this a full half his life ago, by 9-10 months), so that's good at least. But on the other hand again, he has grown lately to have the most unbelievable meltdowns many times each day. They're awful. I'm sure they're due in part to frustration over his inability to communicate adequately, although most of the time they come simply when we need to transition to a new activity.

Although I have a robust catalog, I won't bore you with a litany of further details! Some go in a "he's fine" category, others are warning signs that trouble us more all the time. Bottom line, I'm worried about William right now.  I really wish for a crystal ball to see out another 6-12 months. Is he just taking his sweet time to get out the gate? That could definitely be the case; in some ways he seems just fine. Or...on the other hand...? I pray for him earnestly many times each day. After shrugging his delays and habits off for many months, at this point I struggle to stop myself from running his every move through a "is this a good sign or a bad sign?" filter. He's on my mind constantly.

By the way, we have an early intervention specialist scheduled to come and do a proper eval with him at the end of April. (It's been on the calendar since mid-March; they're booked out 6 weeks.) And second, here are some pics of him from this morning. He and I are fighting colds, plus William seems to have picked up pink eye from somewhere, so we stayed home from church while Jesse and Josiah went in today. I love this boy so much!

The Big Nashville Retrospective

In the middle of March we pushed Jim and Tillie's good graces and good humor by piling into their minivan and coming along on their vacation to Nashville, Tennessee. It was my week of spring break, plus Josiah's preschool break as well, so we figured, why not? I mean, who doesn't love driving 800 miles straight with a 1-year-old and a 4-year-old?

We left Lancaster first thing on Saturday morning, March 12, and arrived in Nashville some 13 hours later. We made the return trip in about 12 hours on Sunday, March 20th. And in between, we had a wonderful time with Jesse's brother's family who lives in Nashville! Here are some of the highlights...

Monday: The Opryland Hotel. Its enormous, flower-filled conservatories, complete with waterfalls, rivers, and other amazing features, are amazing. I never knew such a thing existed inside under glass. William absolutely loved anything involving falling water, and for my part, I loved watching Josiah hold his big cousins' hands while they explored! Nash and Anna were great with the boys all week.

 



Tuesday: We laid low for the day...walked Chloe the dog...played with marbles...hung out...   In the evening we had dinner with our wonderful friends Brad and Heather Daugherty. Such a long overdue treat!

Wednesday: Explored Centennial park and fed the ducks, checked out the downtown farmers' market, and saw a bit of downtown Nashville. I should mention that Will was cutting molars during this entire week. The picture of him miserable in Jesse's arms is probably a more accurate image of him for the week than the happy ones. Poor little sweetie.

This picture, below, cracks us up each time we see it! We were trying to get a fun action jumping shot of the kids. Anna not only nailed the jump but also nailed her brother's face on the way up. And Josiah sort of missed it entirely. So funny! (They're jumping on a really neat, enormous map of the state of Tennessee engraved in the stone on the ground.)

Thursday: Nashville Zoo. What a wonderful place! The kids had a great time in spite of the heat. Can you believe it got to over 80 degrees F that day?

 William loved stroking this guy, above, and Josiah always loves hugging on his baby brother, below!

Friday: Cheekwood Botanical Gardens and Art Museum. Nash and William stayed home with Jim and Tillie, but Josiah and Anna were best buddies for the morning here. It would be even more beautiful to come back to Cheekwood when things are really in bloom!