Easter

We had a beautiful, relaxing, warm Easter Sunday here in Lancaster. After church in the morning, Jesse and I had a little egg hunt in our front yard for the boys...and I couldn't resist taking some pics of them in their adorable matching argyle sweaters, too! Thanks to my mom for the sweaters to Jesse's mom for the oxford shirts!

Then we were off to Jim and Tillie's house for Sunday dinner, along with Tim and Holly too. The boys were ecstatic over a big Easter gift that Mama and Pop Pop had for them: a sand and water play table for the back porch at their house! Tim and Jesse put it together immediately, and it provided a wonderful afternoon of fun for the kiddos.

A little outtake: 
We couldn't get any decent shots of the two boys together because William kept crawling off! The few shots we got of them side-by-side either showed William intently picking at the flowers, which he did for ages, or had Josiah making awkward faces...  Ah well! 

Alien attack

Don't be frightened, earthlings. In case you couldn't tell by the huge smile, he came in peace! 

The text on his body reads "ALIEN PLANET."

Update: Evaluation

On a whim, I called the Early Intervention folks last Monday (see previous post). Due to a cancellation, they were able to move William's evaluation to this afternoon! So, they were here for about 3 hours today, and the good news is that the women were really wonderful and William's behavior was pretty representative of what's typical for him. I think they were able to get an accurate read on where he's at. On the other hand, the bad news is that he falls below the "at risk" line in a several domains, testing in the bottom 1 or 2% of his age group for communicative abilities, motor skills, and social-emotional abilities. (One example: his expressive language is at the level of an 8-month-old baby, and he would have been scored even lower if the evaluator hadn't trusted me on some things that William didn't perform for her but I'm sure are in his repertoire.) Their overall response was in line with mine; he's fine in some areas, but he's got problems in others that have a worrying flavor.

An occupational therapist will begin visiting our home every other week to work on balance, movement, plus more general behavioral issues, and another therapist will come in the alternate weeks to work on communication. The team here today also recommended quite strongly that we consider an autism evaluation or, better yet, see a developmental pediatrician – although apparently the latter could involve a wait of 9-10 months, so into 2012 (which seems utterly unbelievable, don't you think?).

As I wrote last time, I so want to time-warp to the fall and know whether we're running around with a chatty, funny, normal toddler or coming to terms with a diagnosis or set of needs...

Growing concerns

I have a Ph.D. in developmental psychology. I teach about developmental milestones, talk to dozens of parents of young children each year, and occasionally even serve as a "developmental specialist" for local families. Ironic, then, that my two children have been so far from typical in their developmental trajectories! I know as well as the next person that "normal" is based on averaging across the population, and actual, individual children are always going to be somewhat ahead of or behind the curve. But my kids? Not even close.

For instance, Josiah's vision problems (among other things) put his motor skills way behind during infancy and toddlerhood. At 14 months, he tested at 3 standard deviations below the mean for motor abilities (which is to say, in the bottom third of one percent, or put another way, the least proficient kid of 300 of his age). Conversely, his language by age 2 was in the top one percent, and I'd guess he remains somewhere up there. Extremes. Of course what counts is that overall he's just totally happy, healthy, and normal – a great little boy! (I should note that his motor skills are well within "normal" today; he's caught up just fine. I should also note that his eye specialist mentioned bifocals as a possibility for him just this past week. No, we're not going that route!)

Now William. I've been writing off niggling worries over him for over half a year. He officially reached 18 months a week ago, and I think hitting this deadline has really nailed me. For one thing, he still isn't walking, although that's a bit lower on my worry scale. Of much greater concern to us: He doesn't speak at all either. Not at all, as in, not even the most rudimentary "Ma" or "uh-oh." He very rarely babbles linguistic syllables – he just grunts, whines, etc. – and he chooses not to (or can't?) imitate any sounds we make. In the last few weeks he's *finally* begun doing some occasional pointing (he should have started this a full half his life ago, by 9-10 months), so that's good at least. But on the other hand again, he has grown lately to have the most unbelievable meltdowns many times each day. They're awful. I'm sure they're due in part to frustration over his inability to communicate adequately, although most of the time they come simply when we need to transition to a new activity.

Although I have a robust catalog, I won't bore you with a litany of further details! Some go in a "he's fine" category, others are warning signs that trouble us more all the time. Bottom line, I'm worried about William right now.  I really wish for a crystal ball to see out another 6-12 months. Is he just taking his sweet time to get out the gate? That could definitely be the case; in some ways he seems just fine. Or...on the other hand...? I pray for him earnestly many times each day. After shrugging his delays and habits off for many months, at this point I struggle to stop myself from running his every move through a "is this a good sign or a bad sign?" filter. He's on my mind constantly.

By the way, we have an early intervention specialist scheduled to come and do a proper eval with him at the end of April. (It's been on the calendar since mid-March; they're booked out 6 weeks.) And second, here are some pics of him from this morning. He and I are fighting colds, plus William seems to have picked up pink eye from somewhere, so we stayed home from church while Jesse and Josiah went in today. I love this boy so much!

The Big Nashville Retrospective

In the middle of March we pushed Jim and Tillie's good graces and good humor by piling into their minivan and coming along on their vacation to Nashville, Tennessee. It was my week of spring break, plus Josiah's preschool break as well, so we figured, why not? I mean, who doesn't love driving 800 miles straight with a 1-year-old and a 4-year-old?

We left Lancaster first thing on Saturday morning, March 12, and arrived in Nashville some 13 hours later. We made the return trip in about 12 hours on Sunday, March 20th. And in between, we had a wonderful time with Jesse's brother's family who lives in Nashville! Here are some of the highlights...

Monday: The Opryland Hotel. Its enormous, flower-filled conservatories, complete with waterfalls, rivers, and other amazing features, are amazing. I never knew such a thing existed inside under glass. William absolutely loved anything involving falling water, and for my part, I loved watching Josiah hold his big cousins' hands while they explored! Nash and Anna were great with the boys all week.

 



Tuesday: We laid low for the day...walked Chloe the dog...played with marbles...hung out...   In the evening we had dinner with our wonderful friends Brad and Heather Daugherty. Such a long overdue treat!

Wednesday: Explored Centennial park and fed the ducks, checked out the downtown farmers' market, and saw a bit of downtown Nashville. I should mention that Will was cutting molars during this entire week. The picture of him miserable in Jesse's arms is probably a more accurate image of him for the week than the happy ones. Poor little sweetie.

This picture, below, cracks us up each time we see it! We were trying to get a fun action jumping shot of the kids. Anna not only nailed the jump but also nailed her brother's face on the way up. And Josiah sort of missed it entirely. So funny! (They're jumping on a really neat, enormous map of the state of Tennessee engraved in the stone on the ground.)

Thursday: Nashville Zoo. What a wonderful place! The kids had a great time in spite of the heat. Can you believe it got to over 80 degrees F that day?

 William loved stroking this guy, above, and Josiah always loves hugging on his baby brother, below!

Friday: Cheekwood Botanical Gardens and Art Museum. Nash and William stayed home with Jim and Tillie, but Josiah and Anna were best buddies for the morning here. It would be even more beautiful to come back to Cheekwood when things are really in bloom!